Men often judge themselves pretty harshly when it comes to their performance in between the sheets. The unsettling fear of not being able to rise to the occasion becomes a recurring nightmare for men that is often equated with failure, loss of dignity, and masculinity. If you suffer from erectile dysfunction (ED), don’t be so hard on yourself. If you suffer from ED make sure you pay attention to eliminate your impotence.
Research has shown that a secret plague is damaging the cells of men over 45. It’s attacking your endocrine system, which means that it… Makes your erections limp, kills your sex drive, slows your metabolism, destroys your T-levels, saps your energy and motivation, and even thins your hair.
Take the Pressure Off
You can take pressure off yourself by understanding what women really want from sex and learning how to drive your woman wild before you even take your pants off. To put it simply, what women really want from sex is an emotional experience. Women have sex to feel something! They want to feel your desire and they want to feel you are fully present.
Notice sensations in your body. Where is it feeling tight? Where is it feeling relaxed? Can you feel your arms and legs? Is there tightness in your chest or stomach?
Relax your mind. One way to do this is by giving yourself calming messages that help you unclench your body and let go of destructive and anxiety perpetuating thoughts. Instead of paying attention to what might be wrong, notice what is happening in your body with curiosity, not judgment. Try giving yourself positive messages around your body and pleasure like, “My body can give and receive pleasure just as it is” and “It feels good to touch and be touched.”
Connect with Pleasure
Connect with pleasurable sensations. Often, when you begin struggling with ED, you lose connection with the extraordinary pleasure sex can offer you. Continue breathing deeply and using the breath to connect you with any sensations in your body that feel arousing, erotic, sensual or pleasurable. Bring your mind into connection with your body by saying, “I can feel pleasure in my __________ (fill in the blank, i.e., hands, stomach).” Continue to relax and connect with that sensation. Focusing back toward pleasure can really help turn the tides of performance anxiety.
If you lose your erection and then feel guilty or ashamed you will likely distance from your partner and she may feel left alone or abandoned. Instead, if you really make her feel something and give her and her body all the attention it needs.